Someone's in the Kitchen with INNER FURY~!: Desserts Do you have a sweet tooth, or perhaps several sweet teeth clenched in a terrible rictus? One of these courageour concoctions should tickle your fancy. Poor Man's Apple Crisp apples granola or instant oatmeal apple juice, or cider, or hard cider cinnamon, nutmeg, brown sugar Chop up some apples. Combine the apples in a saucepan or a microwave-safe dish with granola or oatmeal and a splash of juice or cider, plus a bit of sugar and spice, and either simmer on the stove top or microwave on high until the apples are tender (about 2-3 minutes). Serves: Usually, one lonely, lonely man. Serve With: If you like hard cider or apple brandy, go nuts. Otherwise, milk is best. Pumpkin-Butterscotch Cookies 1/2 cup butter 1 cup brown sugar 2 eggs 2 tsp vanilla 1 cup pumpkin puree 4 tsp baking powder 1 tsp nutmeg 1 tbsp cinnamon 1/4 tsp salt 2 1/2 cups flour 1 cup butterscotch chips Cream the butter and sugar together. Add the eggs, vanilla, pumpkin, baking powder, spices, salt and 1 cup flour, and mix them up real nice. Gradually beat in the remaining flour. Once a stiff dough forms, stir in your butterscotch chips. Blob the dough onto a greased cookie sheet. These cookies tend to rise but not spread out, so get 'em as thin as you can. Bake at 375°F for 12-15 minutes. Serves: Three or four folks after a long walk through the pumpkin patch. Serve With: Hobgoblin, or other dark ale. NOTE: For some reason, these guys don't taste so great fresh out of the oven, but after a day of sitting in the fridge they're tastier than God's neck itself. If you use pumpkin pie filling instead of plain puree, either halve the spices, or just leave 'em the same for extra goodness. Strawberry-Rhubarb Fool 6 cups chopped rhubarb 1/2 cup sugar 2 tbsp orange juice 1-2 cup(s) chopped strawberries 1 tsp vanilla 3/4 cup whipping cream Combine the rhubarb, sugar and orange juice in a saucepan and simmer over medium heat, stirring frequently until the rhubarb becomes tender and falls apart (about 15 minutes). Add the strawberries, and keep simmering until they're soft (10 minutes). Remove from heat and mix in the vanilla. Let the mixture cool for a few minutes. Whip the cream until its stiff, then gently fold it into the strawberry-rhubarb mixture so that the end result is streaked with pink and quite pretty. Spoon it into fancy dessert cups, or whatever you have on hand. Serves: This dessert is good for amusing a small group of young ladeez (maybe 4-5 of 'em). Serve With: If you're making this dessert, you're either entertaining some ladies, or you're feeling a bit girlish yourself, so go ahead and mix up whatever dumb fruity drinks you know. Not enough here to stick to your ribs? Try some of our Main Meals instead. Hankering for some Quick Eats? We've got those too! Or, you can return to the Cookbook Index.