Monday Night Wrestling 01/08/01 (VCW 102)
Welcome to VCW Monday Night Wrestling, as we bring you the best wrestling known to man, live from the RARENA in RSTATE! Coming off of a HUGE ground-breaking interpromotional pay-per-view event with Slam Masters Championship Wrestling that saw Troy Black defeat Strahd in a classic main event, we've got a big show for you tonight as well! A surprise is in store as Salvaje Demonio faces a mystery opponent hand-picked by the booking committee! In addition, we'll see another great match as David Wright Hubbard goes one-on-one with "Macho Man" Randy Savage! And in the main event, Troy Black challenges Crimson for the VCW World Title tonight in a rematch from Deck the Halls! We've got a lot of action, so let's get right to... hold on, we understand that Ziggy Adderloaf has caught up to Crimson as he enters the arena! Good job, Ziggy! Let's go to that scene...
Backstage...
Crimson is entering the arena, along with Jack Norman, Butch Manson, and Dick Douglas, all of whom are pushing a casket through the hall. Ziggy Adderloaf stops in front of Crimson, prepared to interview him, and Crimson doesn't exactly look happy to see him.
Z. Adderloaf: Crimson, you're defending the VCW World Title agai--
Crimson: Shut the fuck up.
Z. Adderloaf: Um... well... what's that casket for?
Crimson: Mind your business and shut up, little man. Did you see what I did to Johnny Smiles last night?
Z. Adderloaf: Well... yeah...
Crimson: You'd better watch your ass, or that's gonna be what I do to you real quick. Now get the hell out of my face, boy.
Crimson shoves Ziggy Adderloaf aside to the floor, and the other three members all share a chuckle at his expense. Hell's Bikers continue to pass through the halls, pushing the casket along with them.
Crimson's not in the mood to visit tonight. With all due respect, Crimson is the VCW World Champion, and he is probably the most dominant force in VCW history... but is it possible that he could be a little bit nervous going into his match with Troy Black? He looked as though he was in trouble during their last meeting at Deck the Halls... and it's worth noting that Troy Black is the only man ever to gain a pinfall victory over Crimson.
Hold on, it's time for a match... unfortunately, it probably won't be a very good match. "Smells Like Nirvana" by Weird Al Yankovic is playing, and here come Hunk Higgins and Ruby Richard Cage, the Middle-Aged Outlaws, along with "The Pest of the West" Jesse Smark. Last night, they teamed up with SMCW's premiere Hulk Hogan wanna-be, Woody, to battle the tough Scottish brawlers, Highland Hell... and they lost. However, they've been on quite the winning streak in two-on-two tag team matches, which is highly unusual considering that they've been known as the two biggest losers in VCW throughout their careers.
They enter the ring, and we get the usual display of buffonery as Hunk Higgins tears off his tank top, then poses and flexes for the crowd before putting his hand to his ear and getting an earful of boos, while Ruby Richard Cage spins around while pointing at the crowd, then makes the Ruby Cutter sign to a small fizzling of pyro. As the crowd continues to either boo or head for the restrooms and concession stands, Ruby Richard Cage grabs a microphone.
R.R. Cage: Dudes and dudettes, cats and chicks, and all you little kids out there, the baby boomer generation proudly brings to you the future ONE-TIME! ONE-TIME! ONE-TIME! ... VCW TAG team CHAMPIONS of the WOOOORRRLD... "The Immortal" Hunk Higgins... Ruby Richard Cage... the MIDDLE-AGED OUTLAWS!!!
H. Higgins: And brother, if you're not down with that, we've got two words for ya... TOUGH CRAP!!
The crowd gives them a response of lukewarm boos.
R.R. Cage: Tonight, we've got a match against two members of SCUMinistration X, the ManSCUMers... but don't you worry, me and the big man are JACKED UP. We're JACKED TO THE MOON. And we're ready to make the Man-monkeys FEEL THE BANG!!
H. Higgins: Well, ya know somethin', big man, that's no problem, brother. Just because last night we had that flea-market wrestler, that pathetic Hunk Higgins wanna-be Woody, making us look bad, that doesn't prove a thing. The only thing it proves is that Woody has a big streak of yellow running down his back, Jack. But now that we're here again, it's time for me to let the forty-two inch ANACONDAS loose, and show everybody where the power lies, brother. So Manhunters... what'cha gonna do when Hunkamania, the largest arms in the world, and the Middle-Aged Outlaws RUN WILD ON YOU!?!?
The crowd boos, and those boos continue as "Degenerated" by the Lone Rangers begins playing, bringing out the Manhunters. This match practically screams "bathroom break". Nevertheless, the Manhunters come to the ring, ready to do battle with the Middle-Aged Outlaws! VCW referee Bobcat McGavin's in the ring, and we've got a match!
Manhunters
vs.
Middle-Aged Outlaws
w/Jesse Smark
The fans who are in the bathroom sure aren't missing much. The Manhunters maul the Middle-Aged Outlaws with power moves, dominating the match. Hunk Higgins begins Hunking Up at one point, but a nasty chokeslam from Manhunter #1 seems to take care of that. At that point, Jesse Smark begins distracting the referee out of desperation, and suddenly, a miracle comes through in the form of the Marty Jannetty and Lars Coverdale, the Heavy Metal Express, who run to the ring and ambush the Manhunters. A few dropkicks, Rocker Droppers, and superkicks later, both Manhunters are down... and Hunk Higgins is up, as the referee turns away from Jesse Smark!! He bounces off the ropes and hits the Big Leg Drop, then goes for the pin... and gets three!! Unbelievably, the Middle-Aged Outlaws' winning streak continues! How in the hell does this keep happening!?
The
Middle-Aged Outlaws defeated the Manhunters when H. Higgins
pinned Manhunter #1 with the Big Leg Drop in 0:03:37.
Rating: -**
Marty and Lars begin retreating up the aisle, laughing at the Manhunters, as the crowd cheers. Administration X's thugs just got screwed out of a victory, and the crowd loves it! Hunk Higgins and Ruby Richard Cage are celebrating like this was a legitimate, clean-cut victory... but the Manhunters are starting to stir, and the Middle-Aged Outlaws also begin heading backstage, leaving before the Manhunters come around. Inside the ring, the Manhunters are furious as they get to their feet, but with nobody left at ringside to take out their frustrations on, they just start heading backstage.
Hold on... we understand that a camera is watching Virginia backstage. She can't be happy about this; let's go backstage and watch her reaction, courtesy of VCW's Big Brother Production Team.
In the Commissioners' Room...
Virginia is shown sitting in front of a monitor with Arthur Justice, watching the aftermath of the Manhunters' match with obvious dismay.
Virginia: They think they're so smart, don't they? We'll see what happens to them. We already saw what happened to Johnny last night.
A. Justice: Oh yeah. That was really cool, how he got beat up and Crimson gave him the Chokeslam, and then Skarzz did the Skarring on him... great job there, baby.
Virginia: Thanks. And after seeing that from the Heavy Metal Express... I'll work out a similar little punishment for them. How about we take them, and put them with their nincompoop friend, Moy Lazzario... and let's throw in that dumbass who lost the VCW Television Title last night, Ken Collins... and we'll put them in a War Games Match at Wrestlewar. Sound good?
A. Justice: Umm... yeah... but who do they fight?
Virginia: Well, you and the Manhunters, and... errr... Mongo.
A. Justice: Mongo? Didn't he hurt his elbow a while ago?
Virginia: Yeah, but Mongo's tough. He never missed a game due to injury... he could tell Vince McMahon a thing or two about extreme football. Just let him have a few weeks to heal up, and he'll be in there, kicking butt.
A. Justice: Well, okay, but...
Arthur Justice trails off as VCW referee James Applebee enters the room. He was the official for Falcon's VCW World Title match with Crimson last week... perhaps he has something to say about what took place in that match.
J. Applebee: Virginia, I don't mean to interrupt...
Virginia: But you did anyway. Go ahead, but this better be good.
J. Applebee: Well, Lance Errington's booked to go on in a few minutes. Against Russel "The Muscle" Taylor.
Virginia: Yeah, so?
J. Applebee: And he hit me in the head with a wrench last week.
Virginia: Yeah... so?
J. Applebee: I'm a VCW official, and he attacked me. Blatantly. It wasn't an accident or anything.
Virginia: Yeah... SO!? What's your point!?
J. Applebee: Correct me if I'm wrong, but he should be suspended for the next thirty days and fined, not wrestling here tonight.
Virginia: Well, on one hand, you make a very valid point... I guess it does say that in the rules, doesn't it? On the other hand... even you have to admit that you haven't been doing a very good job lately. Maybe he was provoked.
J. Applebee: I think I've been doing a fairly good job. Sure, some things get past me, but just look at my track record compared to that of the other referees. I think you'll see--
Virginia: Oh, bad-mouthing your co-workers, are you? That's not the kind of attitude we like to see here in VCW.
J. Applebee: Well, I don't mean to take anything away from them... but it does make your criticisms about my recent work here look a little silly.
Virginia: So now you're telling me I look silly. Let me get this straight. You come in here, mouthing off to me, bad-mouthing your co-workers, and demanding that I suspend and fine one of the top draws in VCW? Just who in the hell do you think you are!?
J. Applebee: I'm a VCW referee, ma'am. And I'd like to think that I'm entitled to a working environment free from harassment and physical danger.
Virginia: Well, I read your resume shortly after I became comissioner, and I have to say... you do have an impressive background. You wrestled amateur in high school and college, at the top of your weight class... you've placed strongly in several tough-man competitions all around the country... you have a good won-loss record as a pro boxer, and were at one time considered for the Golden Gloves award... you have experience as a referee for the NWA and NCWA... you're one of the top trainers down at the VCW Power Plant... and you've won a few awards as a high school wrestling coach. All that correct?
J. Applebee: Yes, that's all true. I'm not saying that makes me better than anyone else, but I think I'm a qualified man for--
Virginia: You know... a man with your credentials DOES deserve a working environment free from harassment and physical danger. You're absolutely right. And as VCW Commissioner, it's my duty not only to deal with the situation at hand properly. The issue here is that Lance Errington intentionally struck you, a VCW official, with a pipe wrench, and by the rules, he deserves a thirty-day suspension.
But I've got an even better idea... one that'll take care of the issue of Lance Errington striking a VCW official, and one that'll help you to get a working environment free from harassment and physical danger... and that's to see to it that you're no longer a VCW official. Congratulations, Jim... you're fired.
Virginia and Arthur Justice turn to each other and begin laughing at James Applebee's expense, as he stands there, staring at them in disbelief.
J. Applebee: But... but... I'm the only qualified referee left in this company! I--
Virginia: Yeah, whatever. Get your qualified ass out of my office before we slap you around and throw you out.
J. Applebee: You don't threaten me. Maybe you don't remember that when you kids were in the Power Plant, I was the one dragging you down on the mat and twisting you in pretzels. If you want to get violent, I--
Virginia: You don't want me to call the H.A.R.P. Squad in here, do you? Because if I have to do that, they'll be forced to detain you and give you a full cavity search. And in the course of that full cavity search, they might "find" a secret weapon... like maybe a miniature bottle of pepper spray... hidden in a VERY private place. And when they find that pepper spray, maybe their fingers will "slip" when they're removing it, and it'll accidentally go off... and I bet that'd sting a little bit. Maybe that'll happen more than once. You get what I'm saying here? Good. Now get the hell out of my office. I'll mail you your pink slip.
J. Applebee: That's what you think. I won't let you fire me, you bitch... I quit.
James Applebee turns and walks out of the office, slamming the door behind him. Virginia and Arthur Justice exchange a glance.
Virginia: He should have let me fire him. I was going to send him a lifetime supply of Rogaine as a parting gift... God knows, he needs it. But now we need someone else to stick a striped shirt on.
A. Justice: Hey, don't worry about it, baby. When we hit California again next week, I'll stop by the beach and talk to my one of my buddies down there. He's looking for work.
Virginia: Cool. But... can you believe that guy? Qualified referee, my ass... who does he think he is!? I should have fired him earlier.
The camera fades out on the VCW Commissioners' office.
What!? Virginia just fired the best referee in VCW!? Lance Errington's going unpunished for attacking a referee at our television tapings for last week, and now that referee, the best in the company, has been fired! Speak of the devil... Russel Taylor's already in the ring, and here comes Lance Errington as "Can You Take Me Higher" by Creed begins playing. The crowd's booing loudly, especially after seeing that last bit of footage. Lance Errington steps into the ring and prepares to do battle with Russel "The Muscle" Taylor, as referee Jerry Rogers enters the ring to officiate the match. Hopefully, Lance Errington won't attack him, or he just might get fired too!
Lance Errington
vs.
Russel "The Muscle" Taylor
Lance Errington dominates this match, outwrestling Russel Taylor at every turn. Russel Taylor makes a comeback and nails Lance Errington with a few clotheslines, but gets caught with a kick to the midsection, and finished with a DDT.
Lance Errington
pinned Russel Taylor after a DDT in 0:01:18.
Rating: 1/2*
Lance Errington leaves the ring now... and he's looking under the ring... he's got a pipe wrench!! Lance Errington reenters the ring, with the pipe wrench in hand, and Jerry Rogers immediately bails out and runs up the aisle. Lance Errington pulls Russel Taylor to his feet by the hair... and he blasts him across the head with the pipe wrench!! Russel Taylor crumples to the mat, and Lance Errington kicks him out of the ring, where trainers begin helping him up. Now Lance Errington is calling for a microphone... and he gets one.
L. Errington: I'd like to take a moment to talk about what happened during the tapings for last week's show. Specifically, what happened to Lady Erica Whitmore. I didn't mean to hit her in the head with a wrench last week... but in my defense, it probably wasn't too smart for her to grab my arm in the first place. She's done a lot of things that aren't very smart lately... hanging around with that piece of human garbage, Falcon... driving a hole through her navel to put some tacky, gaudy jewelry there... and now grabbing my arm while I was attacking Falcon, which I was doing for her own good. But even though she caused me a great deal of grief and mental anguish by making me accidentally hit her, even though she made me feel like a completely horrible person for striking that beautiful face of hers... I forgive her. Erica... I know you're watching and listening, darling... and I forgive you.
WHAT!? Lance should be asking Erica to forgive HIM, after attacking Falcon with the pipe wrench and accidentally laying her out as well. The crowd's booing loudly, and a chant of "ASSHOLE" begins for him and quickly grows in volume.
L. Errington: Oh, no... not me. You've got the wrong guy. I'm not the asshole here. I've already forgiven her. You want to know who the asshole is... it's Falcon. He's been poisoning Erica's mind against me. I had gone down on my knee, asking her to marry me, and I could see the answer in her eyes... I KNEW that we'd soon be united in blissful harmony. But then Falcon walks in, and just by being there... just by being a bad influence, he pressures her into leaving me hanging there. Falcon's just a lecherous punk, poisoning Erica's mind and violating her body, and if he'd have the guts to come out here right now, I'd whip his sorry ass!!
Oh, please... Lance Errington knows damn well that Falcon spent last night in a hospital, and is currently recovering at home, after the beating he took from the Grave Digger when he challenged for the SMCW Triple Crown World Title. That challenge has no weight behind it whatsoever.
L. Errington: But I guess that won't happen. Falcon's not even going to come out and face me like a man. And I'd recommend that he never does, because the instant me and him cross paths, I'm wiping him off the face of VCW once and for all. And Erica... I haven't forgotten about you either... and there's still time for you to reconsider. After I destroy Falcon once and for all, and wipe out his mind control over you... you're coming back to me, my beautiful princess.
Lance Errington throws down the microphone and begins heading backstage, with the crowd's boos ringing out behind him. Does he actually believe any of what he's saying? Lance Errington is either a blatant liar or a delusional nut case, probably a little of both. If Falcon was here, and in any condition to respond to Lance Errington's comments, I have the feeling that we'd be seeing something entirely different right about now.
Right now, we may very well see something VERY different, though. "Surfing With The Alien" by Joe Satriani is playing, and here comes Salvaje Demonio. He's scheduled to take on a mystery opponent tonight. Names have been thrown around, but who could it be? It's hard to tell what Salvaje Demonio could be thinking, underneath his mask, but not knowing who your opponent is has to be a little disturbing. He enters the ring and faces the entranceway.
"Let's Get It On" by Marvin Gaye begins playing... who in the hell could be using THAT music? It's beginning to appear that this might not be a current VCW wrestler... REX RICHARDS!! Rex Richards steps out of the backstage area, and boy, does he look different!! His blond hair is grown out to his shoulders, his body appears to have bulked up a little bit, and he has a cocky smirk on his face. Wearing sunglasses and a glittery gold robe over a pair of black wrestling trunks, he steps out of the backstage area, accompanied by three attractive Japanese women, who are wearing tight tank tops and blue jeans. What the hell's going on here!? He's reaching for a microphone, as the crowd watches in silent shock...
R. Richards: Rex is back, baby!! Check it out! You Americans are getting the first look at the hottest thing to hit VCW! You're looking at the Gaijin Sex Machine, Double R, Rex Richards!! I been kicking some butts over in Japan, and now I'm back, taking VCW by storm! I'm one tough, bad-ass individual, and all my scandalous females know karate!!
The crowd continues to watch, still stunned into silence, as the three women proceed to perform a rapid, choreographed karate sequence, ending in all three of them draping themselves around the body of Rex Richards. He looks around at them and smiles, then turns back to Salvaje Demonio.
R. Richards: Now, Salvaje Demonio... if that is your real name... me and you have a lot in common. We're both international superstars, and fate has taken us to be in this ring tonight. But just one... one and ONLY one of us, is walking out of here tonight the better man. But right now, I've got an entrance to make... hit it, fellas!!
Suddenly, a stage with a ten-piece band set up on it begins wheeling into view to one side of the ramp, and Rex Richards is bathed in red and gold lights. A line of men in Roman-style gladiatorial armor file out of the back and begin lining up along both sides of the entrance ramp, until they're completely lining the path to the ring. The ten-piece band begins a live version of "Let's Get It On", and Rex Richards struts down the aisle, along with his three female companions, on his way to the ring. This is certainly... unique.
Rex Richards climbs up the stairs to the apron, then holds the ropes open for the three women to enter more easily before climbing inside himself. He spins in circles with his arms outstretched, then stops as the women grab the robe and pull it off of him. With his upper body now exposed, he kneels and flexes his muscles. As he does, the regular arena lights go out, pyro goes off behind him, and red and gold spotlights alternately shine down on him. Finally, as the fanfare dies down, he takes off his sunglasses and hooks them in the cleavage of one of the women, who leave the ring as he prepares to face Salvaje Demonio. The crowd still isn't sure quite what to make of him after that entrance, but Linda Peterson's in the ring, preparing to officiate as this match begins!
"Double R" Rex
Richards
w/three women
vs.
Salvaje Demonio
In the opening portions of the match, Salvaje Demonio's superior quickness triumphs over Rex Richards, taking him down with dropkicks and armdrags and such. But after a short period of that, Rex Richards makes a comeback, and proceeds to attack Salvaje Demonio. His blows are stiffer, and his moveset a bit more varied, but it's obvious that Rex Richards' six months in Japan haven't caused any sort of miraculous transformation in him. Even so, he shows more resourcefulness and workrate than before, keeping up with Salvaje Demonio and cutting off attempted comebacks several times. In the end, however, Salvaje Demonio is too quick, and blasts Rex Richards with a series of quick, intense moves. He gets a near-fall from a flying dropkick, then begins going up top again, presumably for his Swandive Headbutt. But one of Rex Richards's female companions jumps up on the apron, coming face-to-face with Salvaje Demonio as he climbs to the top. And she spits some kind of blue mist into his face!! Linda Peterson calls for the disqualification immediately!!
Salvaje Demonio
defeated Rex Richards via disqualification in 0:06:21.
Rating: * 1/4
Salvaje Demonio staggers around the ring, pawing at his eyes, with that blue liquid covering his face! And Rex Richards is up... Salvaje Demonio turns to him, and gets a kick to the midsection! Now Rex Richards hooks Salvaje Demonio... DDT!! Rex Richards isn't very happy that his big comeback didn't work out after all, and he's taking it out on Salvaje Demonio! He picks him up again, and gives him another DDT!! But he's still not done... he hauls him up again... another DDT!! After three DDTs, Rex Richards has finally done enough, and rolls out of the ring to head backstage with his three female companions. The crowd boos, and he heads backstage, with Salvaje Demonio still laid out at ringside. After he's gone, Salvaje Demonio begins to stir slowly, then gets up and staggers backstage, still rubbing at his eyes.
"Calling Dr. Love" by KISS begins playing next, bringing out "Doctor" Dave Adams and Main Street Pete, along with Nurse Vivacia, to a mild round of boos from the crowd. After a somewhat pathetic loss to Bass Rogers in a handicap match at last week's tapings, these two would seem to have something to prove tonight. But they'll be facing the team of Ken Collins and Moy Lazzario, both of whom would seem to have something to prove as well. But right now... oh, God, Main Street Pete has a microphone.
M.S. Pete: For all that people would like to believe that our victory at Deck the Halls was a fluke... that is, in fact, not the case. What is a fluke is Bass Rogers earning a crooked victory over us at last week's show. What is also a fluke is the fact that we were not involved in last night's supercard. We're bigger stars than anybody in VCW or SMCW... and we're about to show you why tonight.
Main Street Pete hands off the microphone to Dave Adams as the crowd boos.
D. Adams: In fact... all you ladies out there... maybe if you're lucky, you'll find out just why I am such a sensational sexual superstar. You'll have that thrilling feeling in your body when I give you a brush with greatness just before I make my grand entrance, and as your body rocks with the shocks of lightning bolts of pure sexual satisfaction raining down on your body from the clouds above, you'll shake with the thunder, as you lie there in wonder, unable to comprehend how any man could make you feel so good... because there isn't anybody who can put those feelings in YOUR body quite only I can do.
And as the sweat's streaming down your face, down your neck, and dripping off your breasts... as your throat goes hoarse from screaming my name to the heavens so loud that it shatters through the stratusphere and echos throughout the solar system to all of the planets under the sun... you'll know that there isn't any other man who could please you like I can, and that only I can satisfy your body the way you want it. And at the end of the night, you'll bow down and worship your sexual savior, the most magnificent, masculine paragon of pleasure and delight in the universe. I'm making house calls tonight, ladies... and maybe if you're lucky, the doctor will be IN. So brace yourselves for the coming of the orgasmic overlord, and the pleasures that I'm going to bestow on each and every one of you.
Well, wasn't that a delightful waste of time. The crowd's booing loudly... but those boos turn into cheers as "Liquid Mercury" by Jimmy Page begins playing over the arena sound system, and Ken Collins and Moy Lazzario come out of the backstage area, accompanied by Stacey Lockman. They head to the ring, and Ken Collins steps inside, grabbing a microphone.
K. Collins: I'm not in a mood to come out here and babble like this ass just did, so I'll make this short and to the point. Virginia, you want to put us in a War Games match at Wrestlewar? Go right ahead. The only question left for you to ask yourself is which of your henchmen will be the one tapping out when I rip their arm out of the socket. Second of all... King Rasta... you beat me for the VCW Television Title last night, and I respect that... but it's not over. Next week, I want a rematch, and I'm taking my title back.
Now, as far as you two--
D. Adams: Hold on a second, there. I'd like to interrupt your pointless little tirade for just one second, because I couldn't help but notice that you've got the lovely Stacey Lockman at your side. Stacey... I'm giving you the opportunity of a lifetime, to come backstage with me, and get a personal, private appointment with the doctor who can always cure what ails you... and that's me. So Stacey, after I beat these men, right here in this ring, I'll show you exactly--
Ken Collins just stepped forward and cut Dave Adams off with a punch to the jaw! Dave Adams is down, and now Main Street Pete's brawling with Moy Lazzario. Jerry Rogers is in the ring to officiate, and we've got a match on our hands!
"The California
Crippler" Ken Collins & Moy Lazzario
w/Stacey Lockman
vs.
"Doctor" Dave
Adams & Main Street Pete
w/Nurse Vivacia
For the opening minutes of the match, Ken Collins dominates Dave Adams with his vastly superior technical skill, then tags in Moy Lazzario who does likewise. But Dave Adams catches Moy Lazzario with a low blow, and he and Main Street Pete enjoy a brief advantage, until Moy Lazzario comes back, ducking a clothesline from Main Street Pete, then hitting the Thesz press and punches. Ken Collins and Moy Lazzario take the advantage again, working over Pete's shoulder, but when Ken Collins goes up to finish with the Flying Dropkick, Nurse Vivacia shakes the ropes, and he falls on the turnbuckle. Main Street Pete makes the tag, and he and his partner take Ken Collins down with a double superplex for a near fall. Dave Adams works over Ken Collins a little more, then tags in Main Street Pete for the finish. But Ken Collins slides out behind him when he goes for the Main Street Special, then hooks on the California Crossface in the middle of the ring. Moy Lazzario enters the ring, cutting off Dave Adams with a kick to the midsection and an Ace Crusher. Nurse Vivacia jumps up on the apron to interfere, but Stacey Lockman comes from behind and pulls her down to the floor by her ankle. Left alone in the middle of the ring, Main Street Pete has no choice but to tap out.
Ken Collins and Moy
Lazzario defeated Dave Adams and Main Street Pete when K. Collins
made M.S. Pete submit to the California Crossface in 0:07:46.
Rating: **
Ken Collins and Moy Lazzario stand victorious on the inside of the ring, over the fallen bodies of Dave Adams and Main Street Pete, but on the outside of the ring, Stacey Lockman rips Nurse Vivacia's shirt open, then tears it off to a massive roar of approval from the crowd, revealing a white bra and a great deal of cleavage. Stacey Lockman nails Nurse Vivacia with a stiff chest chop, straight out of the playbook of her father or Ken Collins, then rolls her into the ring. Inside the ring, Stacey Lockman hooks the California Crossface on Nurse Vivacia until she taps out, then releases her and joins Ken Collins and Moy Lazzario in celebrating their victory. They leave the ring triumphantly, with the crowd cheering them as they head backstage.
Inside the ring, Main Street Pete and Dave Adams get up, along with Nurse Vivacia. Dave Adams grabs the remnants of her shirt from outside, and covers her with it to a large round of boos. He begins trying to console her, as the three head backstage in defeat, with the crowd booing behind them.
After they're gone, "Through The Never" by Metallica begins playing, and here comes Tim Bell, to the cheers of the crowd. He almost had a shot at the Drifter's SMCW Cruiserweight Title... but he and the Drifter were attacked by Jacob Idol, Rob Solomon, and the Dark Brothers before their match, and it wasn't able to take place. He still doesn't look like he's in great shape now, but more importantly, he looks mad. He enters the ring and immediately calls for a microphone, which he gets.
T. Bell: Last night... I got screwed out of a SMCW Cruiserweight Title match by the Dark Brothers and the Hammer of the Gods, after they jumped me and the Drifter before our match. Somebody needs to get what's coming to them tonight, but the Dark Brothers are way over in SMCW now, and I can't touch them... and I've already beaten Jacob Idol time and time again. Hell, who in this company hasn't? So instead, I'm asking for a match with Rob Solomon, one-on-one, right here, right now!!
A moment's pause follows, and Tim Bell paces in the ring for several seconds, before "Kashmir" by Led Zeppelin begins playing over the arena sound system, and out steps Rob Solomon, carrying his hockey stick and wearing one of the VCW World Tag Team Titles. In his other hand, he has a microphone.
R. Solomon: You know... I was scheduled for a little non-title slaughter against the Heavy Metal Express tonight... but Julian Page just agreed to take my place when he heard you out here running your mouth. Do you know who you're looking at? I'm one of the VCW World Tag Team Champions.
T. Bell: Yeah, and you're also a former VCW Television Champion. I should know, because last March, I was the one who beat you for the title.
The crowd lets out an "oooh" over that one, as Rob Solomon flinches angrily... he didn't expect to have that thrown in his face! But after looking around at the crowd in an attempt to shut them up, he turns back to Tim Bell.
R. Solomon: Just take a good look at who has gold around their waist right now, and who doesn't. VCW Intercontinental Champion... that's Julian Page, not you. VCW World Tag Team Champions... me and Jacob Idol, not the Ontario Color Show. VCW T & A Champion... Jasmina Chastity, not Jennie. We hold over half of the title belts here in VCW, and if you don't like it... you'd better get used to it.
T. Bell: I wouldn't get used to it if I was you. The Ontario Color Show are coming for those titles of yours... in fact, they'll be in California next week looking for you and your partner. You may not have those titles much longer, so I wouldn't get too attached to them.
R. Solomon: And it's Mister Charisma, trying to intimidate that no-good scoundrel Rob Solomon with his awesome vocal powers. Listen, this whole "talking into a microphone" thing... it's not working out for you, man. Give it a rest. And as far as the Ontario Color Show looking for us next week... we won't be hard to find. We'll be those two handsome chaps sitting backstage, waiting for our match with them... because they can have their stupid title shot next week. Your sissy little Canadian friends want a piece of us, they can come get it!!
The crowd cheers, and even Tim Bell manages to nod in approval. Rob Solomon and Jacob Idol against the Ontario Color Show!? Next week!? For the titles!? What a match that'll be!!
R. Solomon: Now listen, I'd love to chit-chat a little more, but this whole thing about you being out here, trying to cut a promo... it's kind of tanking the ratings and killing the crowd here. So you said a little something about wanting a match tonight? This is your last chance to find a way out. You can either bow down and say, "I'm sorry for wasting your time, Mister Solomon, your penis is much bigger than mine," or you can brace yourself to get a first-class experience in personal bodily injury from one of the VCW World Tag Team Champions.
T. Bell: The way I see it, this is your last chance for a true wrestling lesson before the Ontario Color Show gives you your final exam next week. So get in here, and we'll find out if you really can make the grade.
R. Solomon: On my way, Dean Douglas. Just don't take it personal when Shawn won't drop the title to you at the pay-per-view.
Rob Solomon just tossed aside the microphone, and he's heading to the ring! He takes off the VCW World Tag Team Title belt he's wearing, and hands it to a timekeeper, then enters the ring. He and Tim Bell begin circling each other, as VCW referee Bobcat McGavin comes in to call for the bell! This match is on!
Tim Bell
vs.
Rob Solomon
In the opening moments of the match, Tim Bell takes control, using his suplex arsenal and some other moves to bring Rob Solomon crashing down on his head, neck, and upper back repeatedly. But after taking some punishment, Rob Solomon drops out behind him on a suplex attempt, then hits an atomic drop, but holds the waistlock into a German suplex, reminding everybody that he's not exactly a clumsy, untrained oaf when it comes to technical wrestling either. All the same, after that gets a two count, Solomon decides to take it outside of the ring with a brawl, where he has the advantage. On the outside, Rob Solomon dominates Tim Bell with stiff kicks and blows, and a few cases of ramming his head into hard objects around ringside, before taking him back in the ring.
Rob Solomon continues to unleash a dominant, if unfocused, offense on Tim Bell for a few minutes, but when he goes for a possible finish with a lariat Tim Bell ducks, then wraps around and counters with a German suplex for two. Tim Bell goes back in control, still working on Rob Solomon's neck and upper back, but varying it up with some fast-paced high flying offense. He tries a savate kick, but Rob Solomon sees it coming and ducks, then shows Tim Bell how it's done by pasting him with a stiff kick to the face, bloodying his nose. Tim Bell probably doesn't want to get into a martial arts contest with Rob Solomon, because he won't win. Rob Solomon knows how to throw some impressive jabs, chops, and kicks, as we see when he takes Tim Bell to the corner and unloads on him.
Rob Solomon continues the dominance by beating Tim Bell senseless with stiff offense, then gives him a taste of his own medicine with some suplexes, but that brings the match back in Tim Bell's area of expertise, and he manages to flip out of an attempted belly-to-back suplex. He ducks a lariat as Rob Solomon turns and blindly lashes out, then hooks him and brings him over in a big belly-to-belly suplex! But it only gets a count of two and a half. Tim Bell continues to dominate for a few more minutes, then goes for a flying cross bodypress... and gets Rob Solomon's feet in his gut when he connects with a dropkick! Rob Solomon actually seems to remember to capitalize on it this time, and he goes after him with a series of kneelifts to the midsection, followed with some swift kicks to the midsection, attacking Tim Bell's abdominal region.
Rob Solomon retains control for another couple minutes, then puts on his resthold of choice, the abdominal stretch. Weakened by his previous offense, Tim Bell is in serious pain, grimacing in pain as blood from his nose runs down his face, and Rob Solomon compounds his problem by grabbing the ropes when Bobcat McGavin isn't looking. But after this goes on for a while, and things look bad for Tim Bell, Bobcat catches Rob Solomon in the act, and kicks his arm away from the ropes, enabling Tim Bell to hiptoss him to the mat. But Tim Bell's still too weakened to capitalize, and when Rob Solomon pops up from the mat and nails him with a lariat, he's not quick enough to avoid it. Solomon goes for the cover, and gets two and three-quarters.
Rob Solomon continues to dominate this match, but after a few more minutes of kicking the crap out of Tim Bell, he begins stepping up his offense, getting ready for the finish. He hits a straightjacket suplex for two and three-quarters, then gives Tim Bell the sitdown faceslam for a VERY near fall. He goes up to the top, intent on putting him away with the Katana Legdrop... but Tim Bell rolls out of the way! Both men take an eight-count on the mat before getting up, but get up at the same time. Tim Bell blocks a Rob Solomon punch, and takes him over with a belly-to-belly suplex! That strained his abdomen a little, but he bites back the pain and goes on the offensive!
Tim Bell gives Rob Solomon a flurry of offensive moves, slowed down a little by the pain in his weakened abdominal muscles, but still effective enough to bring him down repeatedly. A piledriver only gets two and three-quarters. A powerslam also gets two and three-quarters. So does an Ace Crusher. Tim Bell plants him with a second piledriver, then sets him up on the top turnbuckle and goes up after him, going for the Top-Rope Frankensteiner... but Rob Solomon punches him in the gut a few times when he gets up. Rob Solomon seems like he's about to shove Tim Bell down... but changes his mind. He picks him up... TOP-ROPE GUTBUSTER!! Rob Solomon gives Tim Bell a vicious top-rope gutbuster, then goes for the pin... and in the last fraction of a heartbeat before the three count, Tim Bell gets a shoulder up!!
Rob Solomon pulls Tim Bell up again and works over his midsection with a few more kicks, and by now that just folds him up like an envelope. Rob Solomon hits the ropes and comes off with a lariat, but Tim Bell ducks, then somehow manages to lash out with a savate kick, which Rob Solomon ducks... but Bobcat McGavin doesn't! The referee's down, and Rob Solomon hits a kick to the midsection, then a DDT!! Tim Bell's down as well! Rob Solomon goes for the cover... Tim Bell's down for the count, but there IS no count! Rob Solomon rolls out of the ring... he's grabbing the VCW World Tag Team Title belt! He enters the ring, as Tim Bell gets up... and runs at him swinging the belt! But Tim Bell ducks, then grabs the belt out of his hands... and Tim Bell flattens Rob Solomon with the title belt!! Rob Solomon is busted wide open, and he's laid out... and Bobcat McGavin's getting up! Tim Bell throws the belt out of the ring, and covers Rob Solomon... for only two and nine-tenths! Rob Solomon got a shoulder up!
Tim Bell puts Rob Solomon on the top turnbuckle again, and this time, he's looking too groggy to fight it. Tim Bell's up after tim... TOP-ROPE FRANKENSTEINER!! The crowd's on its feet as Tim Bell pins and hooks a leg... and Rob Solomon BARELY rolls a shoulder up!! It was almost as close as Tim Bell's near fall earlier! Tim Bell picks him up again, and sets him up on a top turnbuckle, facing the crowd, and now he's climbing up behind him. Rob Solomon's nearly unconscious here... that last kickout had to be pure instinct. Tim Bell's up behind him... TOP-ROPE RELEASE GERMAN SUPLEX!!! That's it, Rob Solomon is DEAD!! Tim Bell's also down, clutching his stomach... he may have strained his wounded abs doing that move! But he guts it out, crawling over and throwing himself across Rob Solomon. Bobcat McGavin goes down to count... and the bell rings just after two!! WHAT!? NO!!
Rob Solomon and Tim
Bell battled to a draw in 0:30:00.
Rating: ****
Tim Bell thinks he won this match... he's up, propping himself up against the top rope, and raising his other hand in victory! But as ring announcer David Page announces that it was a time-limit draw, the look of triumph just drains from his face. With his arms over his face, he falls to his knees in frustration, then collapses to the mat, shaking his head, before rolling out of the ring and heading backstage. He stops to tiredly slap the hands of the fans who are cheering for his amazing effort, but it's clear that he wanted a win here in this match, and he didn't get it. Rob Solomon is still down, bloodied and unconscious, and remains that way until Jacob Idol and Jasmina Chastity come out of the back to a chorus of boos, then help him get to his feet and stagger backstage, leaning on their shoulders. That was truly a great match... it's too bad there couldn't have been a clear winner.
Hold on... we understand that a camera is backstage, watching Hell's Bikers as they prepare for a big six-man tag team match set to take place in a few minutes. Let's go backstage and see just what they're up to. As always, credit is given to VCW's Big Brother Production Team.
Backstage...
Crimson, Jack Norman, Butch Manson, and Dick Douglas are backstage, standing around the casket that they brought to the ring earlier. As the other three tape up their wrists and check their boots, preparing to leave for their impending match, Crimson steps over to the door and prepares to leave.
Crimson: I'm gonna see if I can track down that little piece of shit Troy and settle this before our match. Y'all don't let those sissies beat you tonight, hear me!?
J. Norman: Hey, don't worry about a damn thing. We got these clowns.
D. Douglas: But hey, boss... don't you suppose someone ought to stay back here with the casket? You know, to guard it, and shit? It'll fuck up all our plans if someone comes in and takes it.
Crimson: Oh, yeah, right. We'd better watch out, because the Transylvania Mafia's on a robbing spree, going around stealing everyone's caskets so Count Dracula can live in them. ... What the fuck's wrong with you!? Stealing a damn casket. Just shut your ass up and get ready for the match. I'm gonna be pissed off if you can't get the job done tonight.
B. Manson: Hey, don't worry. We got it covered.
Crimson: Yeah, you better. Any one of you gets pinned tonight, me and that sorry son of a bitch are gonna have words.
Crimson turns and leaves the room, as Hell's Bikers finish their preparations.
B. Manson: All right, you heard the boss man. This shit's important tonight. It's time to kick ass. Let's go.
Butch Manson, Jack Norman, and Dick Douglas all leave the room as well, on their way to the ring area, as the camera fades out on the casket, now alone in the room.
Crimson's out looking for Troy!? If he finds him backstage, there might not even BE a VCW World Title match tonight, just a giant slaughter! Back in the ring area, "Bulls On Parade" by Rage Against The Machine begins playing, bringing out the opponents for Hell's Bikers tonight, Scott Hall, Robert Danson, and Devaccio Pola, along with Nicole. Scott Hall and Robert Danson look ready to go, but Devaccio Pola looks like walking death after his brutal match with Hannibal last night. He took arguably the most savage beating in VCW and SMCW history, and he's back, trying to fight tonight!? His face is covered with a few stitches and bruises, including a particularly UGLY bruise on his right eye, which was swollen shut last night, and not looking too much better right now! His body's also dotted with bruises and minor wounds, remaining traces of the fact that he faced Hannibal in a match that was basically a booked shootfight. He's in no condition to compete tonight, especially against a vicious team of brawlers like Hell's Bikers... but he's here anyway.
"Highway To Hell" by AC/DC begins playing next, bringing forth Jack Norman, Butch Manson, and Dick Douglas from Hell's Bikers. They're storming to the ring, and climbing inside for a brawl that breaks out among all six men! Linda Peterson climbs inside to act as referee, and tries to urge some people to clear out of the ring, with little success. Finally, after the others have tumbled to the outside in the course of the brawl, Scott Hall and Butch Manson are left alone in the ring to start this thing off, as the match begins!
Robert Danson, Scott
Hall, & Devaccio Pola
w/Nicole
vs.
Hell's Bikers (Jack Norman, Butch Manson, & Dick Douglas)
The advantage shifts often early in the course of this match, as both teams try to out-brawl the other. Robert Danson is able to contribute some technical wrestling to the match as well, but the same can't be said for the normally technically proficient Devaccio Pola, who looks out-of-sorts and sloppy today, possibly showing side effects after that massive beating that he took from Hannibal last night. He probably shouldn't even be in there. Finally, after Scott Hall gets cocky against Jack Norman, Jack Norman capitalizes, taking him down with a massive clothesline, and Hell's Bikers begin dominating, giving Scott Hall a ruthless beating. They attack Scott Hall for several minutes, wearing him down, but when Jack Norman goes to finish him with the Chokeslam, Scott Hall blocks with an eye gouge, then amazingly gives Jack Norman a chokeslam of his own. He staggers around with his arms stretched out, as if mocking the Giant... then collapses face-first to the mat.
Both men are down, and both make tags, bringing in Dick Douglas and Robert Danson. Those aren't the only people who end up in the ring, however, as an old-fashioned pier-six brawl erupts between everybody involved in this match. Devaccio Pola takes Butch Manson down with a stiff kick, then puts him in the scorpion deathlock, but Jack Norman hauls him off by the neck and Chokeslams him. As Jack Norman turns around, though, Robert Danson and Scott Hall send him over the top rope with a double clothesline. As Robert Danson disposes of Butch Manson, Scott Hall picks Dick Douglas up into a standing headscissors... and he's calling for the Crucifix Power Bomb!! He picks him up... and drives him into the canvas!! Scott Hall goes for the cover... but Linda Peterson reminds him that he's not the legal man. Instead, Robert Danson turns around from tossing Butch Manson to the outside, and climbs to the top turnbuckle, as Scott Hall does the double-hand point to him... FLYING LEGDROP!! Robert Danson hits the flying legdrop on Dick Douglas and goes for the cover... Scott Hall rushes Jack Norman and knocks him down as he tries to run in and break the count... and Robert Danson gets the three-count!!
Robert Danson, Scott
Hall, and Devaccio Pola defeated Hell's Bikers (Jack Norman,
Butch Manson, and Dick Douglas) when R. Danson pinned D. Douglas
after a flying legdrop in 0:12:15.
Rating: * 1/2
Butch Manson reaches in and pulls Dick Douglas out of the ring, and they begin heading backstage... someone will probably have to do some explaining to Crimson, and I don't envy them! Scott Hall and Robert Danson exchange a high-five, then help Devaccio Pola to his feet and help him backstage as the crowd cheers.
As they leave, "Girls With Guitars" by Wynonna Judd begins playing... Jessica Judd's coming out here? What? She's daring to show her face in VCW again after having her head shaved by Christina Ellis? Indeed she is... she's making her way out of the backstage area... WITH A FULL HEAD OF HAIR!? Her hair's every bit as long as it was before, if not longer! The crowd boos as she comes to the ring, guitar in hand, and grabs a microphone.
J. Judd: All of you people who can't appreciate a real entertainment superstar like me need to shut the hell up. I'm the most talented female in all of VCW, and y'all should know it by now. So shut the hell up!!
The crowd just keeps booing. But what's up with the hair? She just had her head shaved a few weeks ago...
J. Judd: Y'all thought that uppity little bitch Christina Ellis got over on me, didn't you? You thought she'd gone ahead and shaved off all my beautiful hair, and made me look ugly. Well, darlin', I found myself a solution. I went to see my favorite crazy old uncle, "Moonshine" Marshall Judd, and he whipped me up a batch of Moonshine Marshall's Hair Tonic. And sure enough, here I am with a full head of long, sexy, drop dead gorgeous hair, and none of y'all can do nothing about it!!
Oh, come on... the crowd's chanting "BULLSHIT" and booing for that. But the question remains, how DID she grow her hair back? That's just not possible, even with some sorry excuse for a story about a crazy uncle...
J. Judd: See, folks can grow their hair back, especially if they got someone who's a real good scientist like my Uncle Moonshine. But I don't think nobody can grow their knees back. And at Deck the Halls, me and Jasmina Chastity crippled that skanky little bitch Jennie and that frisky-handed lesbian pervert, Christina Ellis. You just look at that tape, and you try to tell me she wasn't feeling me up during that match we had! But anyway, we went ahead and messed up both their knees real good, and now they can't hardly walk, much less wrestle.
But I've known Jennie for a long time now, and if there's one thing I know about her for sure, it's that she's stupid, just like all of you people. She's a little slut who'll fuck anything that walks, just like all your little wives and girlfriends who bought you wrestling tickets tonight so they could get a little quality time with the pizza boy. And she don't know what's good for her. I'd even bet she's stupid enough to try to wrestle me after I messed up her leg. So how's about it, Jennie? Me and you, in a wrestling match, at Wrestlewar... how about that? You just let me know, and bring your well-used little ass on down to the ring, because I'll break your other leg, you stupid little bitch.
Now, if you'll all excuse me, I've got to get out of here, before all you sweaty, fat-ass perverts make me lose my lunch. So hit my music!
"Girls With Guitars" by Wynonna Judd begins playing again, and the crowd boos as Jessica Judd steps out of the ring and heads backstage once again. It probably is true that Jennie will accept that match, against better reason... but what's up with Jessica's hair? Of course, the story about Uncle Moonshine's Hair Tonic is ridiculous, but there has to be some kind of explanation...
Hold on, we understand that at this time, Ziggy Adderloaf has caught Troy Black backstage, and is preparing to interview him. Way to go, Ziggy. Let's go to that interview now.
Backstage...
Troy Black is sitting backstage, along with Ziggy Adderloaf, but he doesn't appear to be all there. He's staring blankly ahead, clenching his fists, as if preparing to face some unseen opponent.
Z. Adderloaf: Troy... we all saw you defeat Strahd last night, in an arena that many people would call "his arena", in front of a crowd that many people would call "his people"... and those people cheered you for it. That had to be a major accomplishment in your career. But tonight, you've got another big match ahead of you, as you challenge Crimson for the VCW World Title. How are you--
Ziggy Adderloaf is cut off in mid-sentence as the door flies open, and Crimson steps into the room, carrying a massive shovel in his hands. Troy Black stands up, turning to stare directly into Crimson's eyes.
Crimson: I'll take the questions from here, interview boy. Step out before you end up in a real dangerous situation.
Ziggy Adderloaf quickly takes the advice, scurrying out of the room as fast as he can, like a frightened animal. Crimson takes one step closer to Troy, sneering down at him, but Troy's expression doesn't change. He's just staring directly into Crimson's eyes, with an expressionless face barely masking a swelling force of inner rage.
Crimson: So... I originally came in here to beat your ass, but I figure maybe I'd better go ahead and pick up the slack for our little interview kid. Let me ask you some questions, punk. I know I liked that Hardcore Cage Match last night... how's your little girlfriend, anyway?
Troy Black takes another step towards Crimson, and grabs him by the shirt, pulling him down into his face. Crimson seems to be amused, rather than threatened, as he looks down at Troy.
T. Black: That's none of your business. But Melissa... she's in better shape than you'll be after our match tonight.
Crimson just smiles, then reaches down and pulls Troy's hand off of his shirt. He takes a step back and casually leans against the locker room wall, twiddling the shovel in his hands.
Crimson: Well, that's pretty big talk coming from a pretty small man. See this shovel in my hands, boy? Well, let me go ahead and teach you a little lesson about life. When you were running around the arena last week with a shovel, talking about beating my ass... you thought having that little shovel in your hands made you a big man, didn't you? Well, I'm here to teach you one of the fundamental lessons of life, kid... there's always a bigger man, carrying a bigger shovel.
T. Black: If you came in here for a fight, then let's do it. Shovel or no shovel, I'm not running.
Crimson: Relax... relax. Talking like that is just gonna get your ass beat, boy... and that's another little lesson you need to learn. You better learn to check your mouth, or the next thing you know you'll be in the surgery room while they wire it shut and try to put the teeth back in it. I know you ain't no coward... that ain't what I'm saying at all. So just chill out.
Troy Black continues staring a hole through Crimson, his fists clenched.
Crimson: See, I'll tell you what I'm thinking. I'm gonna let you in on just exactly how old Crimson's mind ticks. A couple months ago, you ask somebody who the man is in VCW... they'd say Troy Black. That's you, kid. And I got real jealous. I thought I should be the man. I wanted all that shit that you had. All that respect, all that money, the VCW World Title, Melissa... hell, I said, I should be the one running around with all that shit. So I decided I was gonna take it from you. And guess what, boy? I did. I was thinking I'd even take Melissa. You think I could take her, boy? You think she'd scream for me!?
Troy Black gets up out of his chair and rushes Crimson, but Crimson reaches out and grabs him by the throat with one massive hand.
Crimson: Bam. Chokeslam. Just like that, you're dead, man. It's all over. Now sit your little punk ass down and let me finish talking, you got that!?
Crimson releases Troy Black, and holds up the shovel, ready to swing if Troy Black makes any sudden moves. Troy stares at Crimson for a long time, then sits down.
Crimson: Good boy. But hell, I don't even want Melissa. She's probably all ugly and shit after getting her little face mangled last night anyway. That's a shame, I bet she would've been a good fuck. Was she a good fuck, boy? How about that, anyway?
T. Black: Shut up and get to the point of what you're trying to say.
Crimson: Hey, I'm just making small talk. Watch that attitude, punk... it'll get you hurt. Anyway, I figure I don't even want her. You know why that is, boy? Because I already got a little bitch of my own. You know who that is? You know who my bitch is, you little piece of shit!? It's you. You're my little bitch, you little fucking pussy, and I--
Troy Black starts to get up again, but Crimson holds out a hand and raises the shovel.
Crimson: You make one tiny move for me, and I knock your fucking head clean off. Do I make myself clear? Good. Little bitch. You even look like a damn little bitch. You got your skinny little waist...
Crimson reaches over and runs a hand through Troy Black's hair.
Crimson: And your soft little girly hair--
Troy Black turns and nails Crimson in the throat with a hard jab, then gets up and begins flailing away at him with a series of jabs, chops, and kicks. But Crimson barely flinches, and nails him in the stomach with a mighty swing of the shovel. Troy Black doubles over, and a second swing connects RIGHT on the back of his neck, sending him collapsing to the floor, motionless.
Crimson: Now what'd I just get done telling your ass!? I fucking told you that doing something dumb was gonna get your little ass beat, but you didn't listen, did you!?
Crimson turns and opens the locker room door, and turns to step outside, but looks back down at the floor, at Troy Black.
Crimson: I've got to go and take care of a little disagreement between me and Dick Douglas. I'll see you when it's time for the match, boy.
Crimson turns and steps out of the room, still carrying the shovel. The camera inside fades out on the lifeless body of Troy Black.
My God. That... was absolutely disgusting. What kind of power trip is Crimson on!? Somebody needs to stop Crimson... but who in the hell can!? Will Troy even be able to compete in the match tonight, after that devestating blow from the shovel!? Crimson had better hope not. As Crimson himself said, it's easy to act big while carrying a shovel... and if Crimson hadn't had that weapon in his hands, I think we would have seen something entirely different. And tonight, one-on-one, if Troy Black makes it to the match with Crimson, he might just kill him with his bare hands!
"Talk Dirty To Me" by Poison is playing over the arena sound system now, and with a little light-hearted fun, maybe we'll get to take our minds off of what looks as though it'll be a very grim situation between Troy Black and Crimson. Marty Jannetty and Lars Coverdale, the Heavy Metal Express, come out of the backstage area, smiling and playing to the crowd, blissfully unaware of what we just saw. They come to the ring, and grab microphones, as the crowd cheers.
M. Jannetty: Hi, I'm Marty Jannetty, and this is my totally excellent partner, Lars Coverdale! We're the Heavy Metal Express, and we're the tag team in VCW that's gonna ROCK your world!!
L. Coverdale: Party on, Marty!
M. Jannetty: Party on, Lars!
L. Coverdale: So Virginia wants us to play War Games at Wrestlewar? Isn't that kind of like Dungeons and Dragons, or something? Because I'm real good at that. I've got this super awesome fifteenth level elf--
M. Jannetty: No, dude.
L. Coverdale: No?
M. Jannetty: Definitely no, dude.
L. Coverdale: Okay. But anyway, we've got this match against these totally bogus losers, Jacob Idol and Julian Page. It was supposed to be--
"Kashmir" by Led Zeppelin begins playing over the arena sound system, cutting Lars Coverdale off, and the crowd begins booing as Julian Page and Jacob Idol step out of the backstage area, accompanied by Jasmina Chastity. Once again, Julian Page is dressed in his full Bret Hart starter kit, and Jacob Idol has a microphone.
J. Idol: You know... there's nothing I hate worse than when somebody comes out and starts talking, when everybody knows that not a damn person in the audience gives a crap what they have to say.
M. Jannetty: So... uh... why are you talking then, dude?
Jacob Idol stops and stares at them, sputtering as he tries to think of a comeback. Julian Page quickly snatches the microphone out of his hands.
J. Page: You know, I don't even see why we're bothering to talk to you either. You're nothing but a couple of lowlife, stinking hyaenas. Prepare to be excellently executed by the best there is, the best there was, and the best there ever will be!!
Julian Page and Jacob Idol head for the ring, prepared to battle the Heavy Metal Express, as Jerry Rogers enters the ring, calling for the bell to begin the match.
Heavy Metal Express
vs.
Hammer of the Gods
(Jacob Idol & Julian "The Hitman" Page)
w/Jasmina Chastity
In the early portions of the match, the advantage fluctuates rapidly as the quickness, speed, and technical wrestling skill of all four men involved comes into play. But a low blow from Julian Page slows Marty Jannetty down, and he and Jacob Idol begin tearing him apart, savagely working on his legs for several minutes. But when Julian Page puts on a figure-four leglock, Marty Jannetty manages to pull himself to his corner and tag in Lars Coverdale, who comes in with dropkicks for everybody who gets near him. Jacob Idol takes the Sweet Chin Music and spills out of the ring, and Lars Coverdale tries to hit it on Julian Page as well, but Julian Page catches his foot, and takes him down. Julian Page goes for the Sharpshooter, but Lars Coverdale grabs his leg as he puts it on, and reverses!! Sharpshooter by Lars Coverdale! Julian Page is a long way from the ropes... he's struggling, trying to make it... he's getting close, after spending entirely too much time in the hold... and he makes it!
Jacob Idol jumps up on the apron... and Lars Coverdale nails him with the Sweet Chin Music, sending him crashing to the floor! Now Julian Page is getting back up, on shaky, wounded legs... and he gets the Sweet Chin Music from Lars Coverdale as well! And Lars is applying the Sharpshooter AGAIN!! Julian Page is down after the Sweet Chin Music, and I don't think he can make it all the way to the ropes again! But Jasmina Chastity's on the apron... she's distracting Jerry Rogers! Julian Page begins tapping out behind the referee's back, but Jasmina Chastity's distracting him!
And here comes Rob Solomon out of the backstage area, a little worse for wear after his grueling match with Tim Bell, but still carrying a hockey stick, with no good intent... but who's that coming up behind him!! It's BRET HART!! Bret Hart just came out behind Rob Solomon... and he clobbers him in the back of the head, and tosses him head-first into the guardrail! Bret Hart's coming to the ring... and he pulls Jasmina Chastity down off of the apron! She slaps him, but he just gives her a look that causes her to back away, then points into the ring, telling Jerry Rogers to turn around. Jerry Rogers turns around, and he sees Julian Page tapping out in the Sharpshooter!! Thanks to Bret Hart, Julian Page just got beaten by the move that he stole!!
The
Heavy Metal Express defeated The Hammer of the Gods (Julian Page
and Jacob Idol) when Coverdale made J. Page submit to the
Sharpshooter in 0:10:59.
Rating: **
Julian Page rolls out of the ring as the Sharpshooter is released, and collapses on the outside, where Jacob Idol and Jasmina Chastity head over to tend to him. Inside the ring, Marty Jannetty and Lars Coverdale celebrate briefly with Bret Hart, who demands a microphone.
B. Hart: You want to be the excellence of execution!? You want to be the Hitman!? You're in luck, because I've got one more match left in me. You've got this pay-per-view coming up on the fifth of February, called Wrestlewar... and if I'm not mistaken, they're planning to have it right in the middle of my backyard, in Calgary, Alberta, Canada. All you have to do is show your gutless face at Wrestlewar, and we'll show everybody who the real Hitman really is!!
The crowd explodes into cheers, but Julian Page isn't in any condition to respond... Jacob Idol and Jasmina Chastity are currently helping him backstage. Rob Solomon gets up, and retreats backstage with his teammates as well, as Bret Hart remains in the ring, with the crowd chanting "HITMAN" and cheering loudly. Finally, after Bret Hart remains in the ring, acknowledging the cheers of the fans for a while, he and the Heavy Metal Express head backstage as well.
It looks like it'll happen. Bret Hart against Julian Page at Wrestlewar. Julian Page has to be regretting all of that disrespect, all of his attempts to disgrace the career of Bret Hart... because now he has to step into the ring with the REAL Hitman, and with all due respect to Julian Page, facing a great veteran technical wrestler, especially one the caliber of Bret Hart, is a task that very few people are up to. Julian Page is no pushover... but he's been in the wrestling business slightly over one year, and I don't like his chances against the vastly more experienced Bret Hart.
"Walk" by Pantera begins playing next, and the crowd explodes into a HUGE chorus of boos, which reduces in volume a little when they see it's "Macho Man" Randy Savage, and not Crimson. He climbs into the ring, and grabs a microphone next, as the crowd continues to boo. He's scheduled to face David Wright Hubbard tonight...
R. Savage: David Wright Hubbard, yeah... you're a lot like that other little lowly worm that Crimson's about to destroy, Troy Black. You think you're a big shot, brother, but the truth is that you're nothing at all, yeah. I've got your number, Crimson's got your number, and that number is zero because that's exactly how many chances in hell there are of you beating Crimson at Wrestlewar, or of you beating me tonight, yeah. So get your cowardly ass out here, brother, and I'm gonna beat you like a dog. OH YEAH!!!
"War Pigs" by Black Sabbath begins playing next, and here comes David Wright Hubbard, to a pop from the crowd! He's wearing a kneebrace on his often-injured knee, and still walking with a bit of a limp, but he's on his way to the ring! A small, but vocal portion of the crowd is booing him, however. He stops on the way to the ring and grabs a microphone.
D.W. Hubbard: So, your Slim Jim-selling ass wants a fight!? I'll give you something you can snap into, you piece of crap.
David Wright Hubbard throws the microphone aside, and he's climbing into the ring, and he begins trading blows with Randy Savage! Jerry Rogers is in the ring, calling for the bell, as the match begins.
David Wright Hubbard
vs.
"Macho Man" Randy Savage
This turns out to be less a match than a brawl. The advantage is uncertain in the beginning moments of the match, but as time goes by it's David Wright Hubbard who pulls out the clear advantage, beating the Macho Man from pillar to post, though the quality of the in-ring work isn't up to the standard of their first, awesome meeting at Blood and Thunder. The brawl spills outside, where they continue to brawl, ramming and whipping each other into various unforgiving foreign objects at ringside. Randy Savage gains the upper hand on the outside, and brings David Wright Hubbard back into the ring, before proceeding to slow this match down for several minutes with some methodical, calculated offense and a resthold or two. The Flying Elbowdrop connects with only the mat as David Wright Hubbard moves out of the way, and from there it's punches, power moves, a lariat, a kick to the head, and a power bomb for Randy Savage, courtesy of David Wright Hubbard. David Wright Hubbard appears to be ready to go for the Flying Cross Bodypress, but Crimson comes charging out of the backstage area, wearing the VCW World Title... and he's still carrying the shovel! He slides into the ring behind David Wright Hubbard, as he begins to climb the turnbuckle, as the crowd boos. David Wright Hubbard turns around... and Crimson fells him with a massive blow from the shovel! Jerry Rogers calls for the disqualification!
David
Wright Hubbard defeated Randy Savage via disqualification in
0:09:08.
Rating: 3/4*
Randy Savage is disqualified, but he doesn't seem to mind that much as he gets up... he just aides Crimson in attacking David Wright Hubbard, stomping away at him as Crimson strikes a few more blows on his fallen body with the shovel, as the crowd explodes into boos. Finally, Crimson and Randy Savage exchange a glance, and Crimson picks David Wright Hubbard up by the throat. Randy Savage is going up top... Crimson with the Chokeslam!! And Randy Savage follows up with the Flying Elbowdrop!! David Wright Hubbard has been laid out, and they're throwing him out of the ring!! Now Crimson has a microphone, as the crowd continues to boo.
Crimson: We got his ass. Somebody send out the trainers or some doctors and get this piece of trash out of here. He's gonna be in the main event in Wrestlewar!? That's just pathetic.
Some trainers are coming out for David Wright Hubbard, who's just convulsing on the floor now. They're helping him backstage, and it's probably a good thing... otherwise, when he came to, he'd want another piece of Crimson and the Macho Man. But who CAN stop Crimson, with odds like these? The crowd's booing loudly, but they're going unnoticed by Crimson.
Crimson: Okay, main event time. Bring out the casket.
A funeral march begins playing, and all three of the other members of Hell's Bikers, now dressed in black denim jeans and black T-shirts, with black leather jackets over top, begin pushing out a casket. The crowd boos this entire bunch of time-wasting nonsense.
Crimson: We are gathered here today... to witness Troy Black getting his sorry ass beat for the last time by Crimson. We're here to pay our respects, all that good crap... because this is the last time you'll ever see Troy Black again, unless you go to his funeral after the match. Considering I'm gonna be the one murdering his ass in cold blood, I figured I'd be a nice guy... I'm providing the casket here for him.
Hell's Bikers push the casket out to ringside, then stand there next to it briefly, awaiting further instructions.
Crimson: Now boys... Macho... y'all are gonna have to wait this one out backstage. Me and Troy have to do this man to man. So crack open the cooler, and get the funeral party started for me. This ain't gonna take long.
Hell's Bikers and Randy Savage all start heading backstage, stopping to give Crimson a thumbs-up sign or nod of approval as they leave. Crimson paces eagerly in the ring, and a smile crosses his face, as the crowd boos him again.
Crimson: Now, Troy... you gutless piece of crap... you puny little no-account waste of human life... you skinny little bad-necked worthless son of a bitch... I'm calling you out, boy. You wanted this match... you got it. Bring your little punk ass out here.
Crimson stands and watches the backstage entrance, awaiting the arrival of Troy Black. After a few moments, with no sign of him, a "WE WANT TROY!" chant begins in the audience, and quickly grows in volume. Crimson paces in the ring for a few more moments before raising the microphone again.
Crimson: What's the matter, little man!? Did you finally turn around and run for your pathetic little life? Did your little girlfriend call from the hospital and talk you out of fighting me again!? What's the matter, boy!? Get your gutless ass out here, you piece of trash!!
A few more moments pass, and still no sign of Troy Black is seen. Then, suddenly, the ViolenTron comes on, showing us a scene backstage...
Backstage...
Troy Black is trying to walk through a hallway, but a doctor-like person is standing in his way, trying to physically block him from moving through, and shouting at him desperately.
Doctor: Don't you even THINK about going out there, Troy. You've probably got a concussion, you know that!? That's not even considering more neck damage. You go out there, you could be--
Troy Black finally quits trying to push his way past the doctor, and acts as though he's about to turn around and leave in disgust... then turns and nails him with a punch to the side of the head, sending him down. Troy Black steps over his body and continues walking through the hall, on his way to the ring area.
Back in the ring, the crowd is cheering, and the "WE WANT TROY" chant is growing in volume even more. Crimson looks up at what he just saw on the ViolenTron, smiling, and raises the microphone to speak again.
Crimson: You know, the second you--
Crimson is cut off as "For Whom The Bell Tolls" by Metallica begins playing, and the arena lights are replaced by Troy's dim silver-blue lights. The crowd erupts into cheers nearly loud enough to drown out the music when Troy Black steps out of the backstage area, and begins walking towards the ring with purpose. Crimson takes off the VCW World Title and throws it aside, then goes into a fighting stance, and motions for Troy to get in the ring and fight. Troy Black's not hesitating... he slides into the ring! Crimson goes for a clothesline... Troy ducks!! Troy Black begins unloading on Crimson with rapid punches and kicks, but Crimson's barely flinching! He knocks Troy Black to the ground with a massive right hand, as Linda Peterson enters the ring to officiate this match!
All Non-Participants
Barred From Ringside:
For the VCW World Title:
Troy Black
vs.
Crimson (c)
The opening minutes of this match are basically a one-sided mauling. Crimson absorbs everything that the wounded Troy Black has to offer in the way of offense, and dishes out a brutal beating in return, knocking Troy all over the ring. Troy's swift kicks to the kneecap and dropkicks to the knee take a minor toll, but Crimson fights past the pain, refusing to let Troy's offense slow him down or derail his offense. That offense is the key to Crimson's chances of winning this match... he has to capitalize on the fact that he's the most powerful destructive force in VCW, and do what has often been nigh impossible to previous opponents of the challenger... he must deliver enough destructive offense to keep Troy Black down for the count.
After a missed lariat by Crimson, Troy Black comes back with a savate kick that knocks Crimson back against the ropes, then hits another one that sends him over. With Crimson down, Troy Black runs at him and jumps out onto him with a tope. Crimson staggers back and crashes into the guardrail! On the outside, Troy Black ups the ante by giving Crimson a forceful introduction to some of the objects around the ring area, culminating in whipping him bad-knee-first into the ringsteps. Crimson's reeling, but like Troy Black, he's capable of taking unbelievable amounts of punishment before going down.
Back in the ring, Troy Black begins working over Crimson's knee with a vengance, going back to his strategy at Deck the Halls, trying to take Crimson off his feet. But a kneebar, then a half Boston, both only result in Crimson being able to reach the ropes for the break quickly, thanks to his strength and his tall body and long arms. But Crimson's just too big, and sucks in some more kicks to the knee, enduring the punishment for the chance to catch Troy Black with another mauling right hand. Troy goes down, and Crimson goes back on the attack with more devestating power offense, including a gutwrench suplex, a lot of massive right hands, and his ragdoll full nelson into a full nelson slam.
With Troy Black starting to look limp and drained of energy, Crimson whips him into the corner, then charges in with a kneelift. Troy Black moves out of the way, but Crimson stops himself in the corner, then turns around and blasts Troy Black with a lariat, before pointing to his head and smiling. Obviously, if one of these two men is to be classified as a "thinking man's wrestler" it would be Troy Black, but Crimson just showed that he's no mental slouch either. He damaged his knee with a reckless charge like that at Deck the Halls, and this time he came in with a bit more caution, and avoided making the same mistake again!
Crimson mauls Troy Black with some more rough offense, then whips him into the ropes, and goes for a massive boot to the head... but Troy Black ducks, then turns and takes the off-balance Crimson down with a dropkick to the knee! Troy Black pauses briefly to shake off some of the punishment he's taken in this hellacious match, then fires a series of elbowdrops into Crimson's knee, and drags him to the center of the ring... and he slaps on the figure-four!! Crimson's in the figure-four leglock again... but was this a futile attempt? Crimson's gritting his teeth and fighting it out... he's turning the figure-four over... and he does! But Troy uses his momentum, and rolls with it to turn it over again! But now they're near the ropes, and Crimson reaches out and grabs the ropes, getting a break. Troy Black takes the full four-count before releasing the hold.
Crimson's getting up, and Troy goes up to the top turnbuckle... and comes off with a flying clothesline! But Crimson bats him out of the air with a lariat of his own, absorbing the flying clothesline!! Crimson just knocked Troy Black clear out of the sky... Troy Black's getting up, and Crimson puts him in a standing headscissors... POWER BOMB!! Crimson just splattered Troy Black on the mat, and he's giving a Chokeslam sign. He pulls Troy Black up by the throat, and lifts him... CHOKESLAM!! But rather than playing to the crowd or going for the pin, Crimson just watches him... and Troy Black sits up! But Crimson seems like he was waiting for that, and kicks a field goal on his jaw when he pops up! Troy Black goes back down, and after pausing to rub his knee a little, Crimson points to his head again. Crimson has definitely learned a thing or two from their past meeting.
Crimson's picking Troy Black up again, and he's going for a second Chokeslam... but he turns to the crowd and draws his thumb across his throat, signalling that it's over. He begins to lift for the Chokeslam... but Troy Black kicks him in the groin!! Crimson doubles over, and Troy Black hooks the arms... DOUBLE ARM DDT!! Both men are down, but Troy Black's face contorts with effort and pain, as he forces himself to get up! He's going up to the top turnbuckle... BLACK DAGGER!!! But Crimson rolled out of the way!! Crimson rolled out of the path of the Black Dagger, and now both he and Troy Black are getting up!
Crimson grabs Troy and whips him into the ropes... but Troy Black ducks an attempted lariat, and runs into the other side! Troy Black comes off the ropes with a spinning leg lariat... and Crimson ducks low! Troy Black sails over his head, and grazes Linda Peterson, sending her down! Troy Black begins to get up, but Crimson flattens him with a big headbutt! Now Crimson's going to the apron... he's got the shovel he brought to the ring!! Troy Black's getting up, and Crimson's measuring him for a hit with the shovel... but he'd better do it quick if he doesn't want disqualified, because Linda Peterson's getting back up, too! Crimson swings the shovel for his head, but Troy Black ducks!! Kick to the groin!! And now Troy Black's got the shovel, and he nails Crimson right between the eyes with it... right as Linda Peterson looks up!! And she's calling for the bell!! DAMN IT!!
Crimson
defeated Troy Black via disqualification in 0:15:50.
Rating: ** 1/4
(Crimson retained the VCW World Title.)
The crowd bursts into a huge round of boos and a chant of "BULLSHIT" as the disqualification is announced, but Troy Black doesn't seem to care. Crimson's busted wide open, and starting to get up... and Troy Black nails him right in the forehead with the shovel, sending blood splattering! Troy Black's about to pay Crimson back for what happened earlier by caving his skull in with this shovel!! And the crowd's loving it!!
But wait... here come the troops! The crowd's booing loudly as Jack Norman, Butch Manson, and Dick Douglas charge out of the backstage area. Troy's ready for them... SHOVEL TO THE HEAD!! Down goes Dick Douglas!! Butch Manson takes a shovel to the head as well, and goes down... but Jack Norman comes in with a massive forearm shot, knocking Troy Black! He grabs the shovel away from him, and drills him with a shovel shot to the midsection, then a blow to the back when he doubles over! Troy Black crumples to the mat, and Hell's Bikers are starting to recuperate! This looks really, really bad for Troy Black. He's laid out in a ring full of enemies, and no help's in sight... Melissa's still laid up in the hospital...
But the casket lid just flew open!! The casket just opened by itself, and someone's sitting up out of it!! GABRIEL BLACK!! Gabriel Black was hiding in the casket, and he's sliding into the ring!! Jack Norman swings the shovel, but Gabriel Black ducks, then nails him with a kick to the midsection, and grabs the shovel away from him! Gabriel Black takes Jack Norman down with a shovel to the head, and he rolls to the outside! Dick Douglas gets up, and takes a glancing blow as well!! Butch Manson rolls out of the ring... but Crimson's back up!! Gabriel Black charges Crimson... and nails him in the head with the shovel! Crimson falls backwards, over the top rope, and the crowd is going nuts!! And now Troy Black's up!!
Troy Black and Gabriel Black exchange a brief stare... and Gabriel holds out the shovel, offering it to Troy. Troy takes it from him, and the crowd cheers! Crimson and the other members of Hell's Bikers are standing outside of the ring, yelling threats to Troy and Gabriel Black... Jack Norman charges the ring and jumps up on the apron, but Troy knocks him off by hitting him in the head with the shovel!! Crimson holds the others back from any attempts to charge the ring, though none of them are too eager after seeing what just happened. Crimson grabs the VCW World Title and points to it, then puts it around his waist, as his blood-covered face twists in an angry sneer, but he's retreating backstage, along with his other thugs and accomplices. Troy Black and Gabriel Black are standing side by side in the ring, and the crowd's cheering them on... and Hell's Bikers are on the retreat! Troy Black may not be the VCW World Champion... but the VCW World Champion is the man covered in blood, returning to the backstage area with his gang of thugs! We're out of time for tonight... see you next week!
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